Reflecting on me

As I sit here at work and wonder what the heck I can do with my remaining 2 hours of boredom I recall that I started a blog. Not a very interesting blog and definitely a directionally challenged blog, but a blog nonetheless. 

Nothing new has really be happening since the last post. I still am not pregnant. No surprise since it is past ovulation and too early to take a pregnancy test, but I fill it should be said seeing as how this is a blog of all aspects to my life. My husband and I have been talking and things in our house appear to be at a change. A good and exciting change. The house will be cleaner, and more organized. The groceries will be bought all at once with a menu in mind, and the laundry will stop reaching a pile large enough to bury us in. Work is going good. Slow still. Different with the lower number of patients I see a week. Makes me want to pull my hair out. I can't lie. I LOVE being busy! C'mon patients...please...no??

It has given me a lot of time to think and contemplate my lot in life recently. Finding that I am not as happy or as content with myself as I had originally believed was a nice wake up call, and good perk to this job change. I am a Christian, Godly woman, and I will be the first to admit that I do not put in the time my faith and obedience to my Father requires. It is a daily struggle for me to learn to balance life and the Lord. Realizing that my husband and I talk big talk about following God's plan for us instead of actually walking in God's plan and putting forth some effort to listen was a huge hit to my ego this week. Now, don't get me wrong. We both pray separately, and listen separately, and ask for things separately. However, as for getting together once a day or week or month to have a reading and conversation about our lives and with our God we fail. Drastically fail. I don't think this is a problem that we alone or me alone face, but I think it is one that we miss until we are looking at our lives and relationships years later. 

 I don't want to be looking back on my life years later thinking, Holy crap what was I thinking and doing all these years!. Here I start. Today I start and we start. My husband and I have talked and discussed and today is the day. I will have quiet time once a day. I will come before the Lord and listen. I feel it in my soul that he has been trying to give me a solution to this lost and unfulfilled time in my life, and it is past time to figure out what He has been trying to convey to me.  Through no fault of His and all through neglect of our relationship on mine. Here I go...